Today I Blew It

Today I messed up.

I missed an opportunity to follow God’s leading and make a difference.

I was running some errands in town and walked past a homeless man with a sign that said “I’m homeless and I’m hungry”. I looked at him and I walked by, just kept going on my way.

All the while the words of Jesus was pounding in my heart “whatever you do for the least of these you do for me”.

I started to rationalise the situation in my head, “what should I do, If I give money he’ll probably use it for alcohol, maybe I should take him some food…” So stereotypical isn’t it, see a homeless guy and assume he’s on the booze or drugs.

I ran my errands and decided that I needed to walk back the same way, go and see him.

I still didn’t know what I was going to do as I rounded the corner where he was…

I’d taken $5 out of my wallet and had it in my pocket, that would be the easy solution, throw money at him and be done with it… I should go buy him some food, even take him with me, chat with him, show him he’s worth more than just a few bucks, that he’s valued for who he is…

As I rounded the corner – he was gone.

I couldn’t have been more than 10 minutes – but he was gone.

I looked for him but couldn’t find him. My heart sank, heavy with remorse at a missed opportunity to obey my Heavenly Father and show love to my fellow man.

I’m ashamed that I had to think about it, debate the decision, when I know that I am His hands and feet.

Today I blew it.

Why do we find it so hard to follow God’s whispers, why do we need to think we know best…

Forgive me Lord for not following your lead. Teach me, train me and grow me to respond without question, to be obedient Your call.



Filed under About Me, church, God Stuff, Worship

5 responses to “Today I Blew It

  1. Honest and thought-provoking post. I think the key is that you went back. God bless you in your walk.

  2. Ed-

    Unfortunately I’ve been there and done that.

    Thanks for you honesty.

  3. oh man – I hate it when that happens!

  4. Eddy

    Everyone thanks so much for your encouragement

    I hope we all learn to hear and act on God’s promting better – trust that He knows what He’s doing 🙂

  5. Just because you walked past – does not mean that you blew it. Your heart was good, perhaps you were distracted – it sometimes can be hard to stop and give.

    We have many people begging on our streets, some are genuine, some are just thieves, using begging as a means to coerce money from people – telling which is which, is difficult. I have even seen them doing shift changes on pitches and handing over money between them.

    This type of individual can become aggressive and threatening if you ignore them or say no. They are a nuisance and a distraction from those who have a genuine issue of homelessness or poverty.

    In the UK, those who sell the homeless Magazine “The Big Issue” tend to be genuine, but who are trying to help themselves out of their dilemma. I am happy to buy a copy, which helps them.

    The harder ones are those who are perhaps suffering from some form of illness, it is a known fact that over 60% of men on the streets have had some form of military service and might in fact be suffering from Post- Traumatic Stress, but the safety net has not caught them. Others may be the victims of abuse or violence or have some form of addiction to alcohol or drugs. Difficult to discern.

    I will stop to talk but if I am am asked for a Cigarette etc, I will refuse, but am willing to offer help in the form of the nearest hostel with welfare assistance available, and in a worse case, provide a small cash payment.

    It can put you in a moral quandary, but sometimes walking on by can be the safest option.

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